lex & brian’s foolproof way to not get fit:

1: buy a gym membership.

2: decide to go to the gym.

3: actually workout, even though it seems so foreign.

4: go home, exhausted.

5: decide your arms are too sore to scoop your own ice cream.

6: go load up a cup at yogurtland.

7: add extra cookie dough bites and avoid all fat free yogurt.

8: go home, happy.

9: decide you’re not too tired to scoop up ice cream.

10: eat more ice cream in bed, complete with chocolate syrup and whip cream.

11: go to bed, full.